All States Bulletin

WANTED: Elizabeth Marilynn Findlay

Age: 3 going on 30

Description: Big green eyes, a shorty, cute smile, and silly giggle.

Alias: Pillet, Bill, Lizzy, Lovey

Alleged: Being cute, overly independent, and a stinker. Takes care of everyone else.

If Found: Give her a hug and tickle her armpits. She thinks it's funny.

REWARD: Lovable, snuggly, smart (taught herself to count to about 100), beautiful, helps mommy, shares (when it's her idea), has the funniest giggle.

No Admittance-Unless we like you...

After reading and hearing about so many problems people are having from "weirdos" reading their blogs we have decided that we're "going private." However, we don't want to do it yet because we don't have everyone's email address.

So here's the deal: everyone needs to send their email addres to the following address: jasonsdate@gmail.com or leave it on a comment to this post. We'll give you all one week. If you haven't visited the blog in that time you OBVIOUSLY don't like us enough to want access to our blog so you WON'T be invited in!

And for all you blurkers out there, this is your chance to actually be IN on the action instead of just getting the windows all foggy.

Of course, EVERYONE is welcome (except for all of you freakin' perverts out there!) we just need your email addresses so we can invite you. Good? Good. OK. The End.

Valentines day on hormones

Yesterday was full of its ups and downs (the definite up, of course, being my date with Jason :))
I think a good illustration of the entire day can be described in my trip to McDonald's. As I was cleaning my room, I discovered I had......drum roll....2 WHOLE DOLLAR BILLS!!!!! I never have cash. Suddenly, the thought of packing the girls up for preschool didn't seem so impossible. I could drop them off and then get some sausage!!! I worked quickly-as fast as my blueberry would let me without throwing up. The girls were only 2 minutes late. As I drove away I literally prayed to thank Heavenly Father that I was making all of the green lights. I got more hungry as I drove. (It's about 6 blocks from the girls preschool to McD's-but there are 2 traffic lights.) I pulled off to the side to find out just how much cash I had and found I had another dollar in change. I rejoiced. I pulled up to the window and realized that I NEEDED hashbrowns too.
"Welcome to McDonald's, what can I make for you today?"
"Does the sausage and hot cakes platter come with hashbrowns." I desperately needed to know.
"No."
Panic ensued. AHhhhhhh!
"Can I substitute the hot cakes with hashbrowns?"
"So no hotcakes?!" She sounded horrified.
"That's right. "
"Okay, that's $1.08"
I pulled forward, again rejoicing. Leaning forward in my seat in anticipation. Suddenly I realized that $1.08 wouldn't cover what I ordered. I literally-and this is great- let out a sob. "NO!" I plummeted down to the "depths of despair" that would put Anne Shirley to shame. I pulled up to the window.
"Hi. I think you misunderstood my order." (She looked shocked.) "I really NEED just sausage and hashbrowns. Can you do that?"
"Um..." she looks around for a manager. I panic.
"Can't I just have the sausage biscuit and hashbrowns from the .99 cent menu?"
"oh, I can fix it."
I had to hold myself in my seat and check my tears of joy. Seriously. She looked at me with some worry.
"I'm pregnant." I explain. Suddenly she's trying not to laugh. I don't mind because I'm so HAPPY. When I got to the window, the lady only gave me the hashbrowns. DESPAIR!!!!
"Um, excuse me. I'm supposed to have sausage too..."
She looked at me like I was crazy. But then handed over the bag. OH WHAT JOY!!! I was $2.00 poorer but, oh so happy. From tears to joy and from starvation to gluttonous binging. Ode to McDonald's! What would I do without you? Da da da da da, I'm lovin' it!

We're like the Von Trapp family you know...

Here's the thing. We live in a small but comfortable condo. Michelle and I decided that we didn't want to have to shout to get our kids to come to us (you know you always want your kid to come to you instead of you going to the kid right? anyway...) so we devised a series of whistles. Each child has his/her own tune that we whistle to get them to come to us. We just use our lips, no fancy naval whistles or anything.

So far it's been working quite well. The kids help each other out too. If Michelle or I whistle someone's whistle the other kids will excitedly remind the child whose whistle was whistled that they need to come to us. Whew! that was a lot of "whistles."

Well the other night the kids were watching the new Pride & Prejudice and Ben decided that they were going to have their own dance right in our living room. He deftly cued the movie to the public ball and then got all the kids dancing. How could I not get that on tape?

So, just like the Von Trapp family, we whistle for our children and they dance together. If you don't remember the second reference then it's been FAR TOO LONG since you saw that movie last.

Why I LOVE/am addicted to Blogging

About a year ago, I started a "series of unfortunate events" that led me into a depression. It's weird when I look back onto that period of my life. Everything seems dark, even in memory. Between the depression and health problems, I dropped out of contact with the human world it seems. I began to emerge from the abyss during the fall and discovered that I had no idea what was going on in anyone else's life. I thought about it and realized that I really hadn't kept up with what's going on for a long time. I think having small children makes that normal but nevertheless, I realized I missed everyone. I missed the gossip and encouragement.
I am a shy person. It's weird because I can be a chatterbox- I talk when I'm nervous or uncomfortable. Or if I know you really well. ( This can be annoying and is a weird flaw in my personality that shows Heavenly Father has a sense of humor.) Because of my shyness, it seemed too difficult to get to know everyone again. Then, I was introduced to "the blogosphere." When I found how many of my gorgeous, talented, incredible, and extraordinary cousins had blogs too I was excited. I feel compelled to mention that I wouldn't have made it through the first awful bout of morning sickness without you to connect me to the world outside of my bedroom and the living room couch.
It was fun today to reconnect in person with some of you. It just seemed like everyone knew each other better. I'm so grateful for all of you. Your talents and ideas as mothers and wives inspire me to be better, and happier! Thanks for including me in your club. I missed you.

PS To my new Aunt Kate: welcome to the family. We all really like you, you know.

Pregnancy Odds and Ends

So, I've been thinking, (I know some of you are shocked) there are a lot of questions that have popped up in this pregnancy and others. Some of these I know the answers to but they still make me wonder. Here are the top 10:

1. What happened to my body between pregnancy number 4 and this one? What is the deal? I feel HUGE!!!! It's not weight huge, it's that I feel so slow and HEAVY all the time. Isn't that supposed to happen during the second trimester? What's with this!!! I'm already starting to crave those huge pouch maternity pants that I can wear around my ribs, thus leaving my waist and tummy unrestrained. I know, that was more than one question. I'll move on...
2. Why is it that when the parasite, I mean baby, is the size of a "sesame seed" I eat 10 meals a day but when it's the size of a watermelon, I only eat what I can force down? What's the point of 10 meals a day? I just throw it up anyway. Why not just skip the cravings and the food and the nausea and move on? How much of it actually gets to the baby?
3. This question relates to the above question. Why do the websites all compare your baby's size to food? My favorite is the kumquat. Does anyone actually know what one looks like? I looked it up online once. The person compared the kumquat to a small kiwi. Why not just say "small kiwi" then? Has anyone out there even tried a kumquat? What do they taste like?
4. Why do we always feel compelled to say things about a pregnant woman's size? My least favorite is when people say "you don't look big enough to be...." WELL I FEEL BIG ENOUGH AND BESIDES I EARNED THE SIZE OF MY TUMMY! Even sane women who have been pregnant before always feel strangely compelled to express their feelings to pregnant women. Why? Don't you know how dangerous it is? You know what the hormones do. Just stay away from the topic altogether. Nothing about weight is a compliment.
5. What's up with the name Micheal Martin Murphy? I know it has nothing to do with pregnancy-except it makes me nauseas to hear it or think of it. ewwww
6. Why, oh WHY does the unmarried, no children nurse ALWAYS think she knows what you're feeling and why you're feeling it? Don't tell me to calm down. YOU calm down...
7. I used to love winter. Why is it still snowing? The color white is starting to make me nauseas. This has been the worst pregnancy for nausea so far and I'm convinced it's because the snow won't go away...
8. Just how many brain cells do you lose during pregnancy and childbirth? I think I've already lost all of mine. Have you ever tried to explain to a 6 year old that movies aren't real life with no brain cells in your head. I don't think I finished any sentences. The other day Ben asked me what plus(+) means and I had to think really hard what the answer was.
9. Why do we always move when I'm pregnant?
   
10. How did I get so lucky as to be married to Jason? He gets up in the morning, organizes scripture study, gets the kids breakfast, unloads the dishwasher, and takes out all the garbage so I don't have to smell all the pee from the overnight pull-ups and diaper. Then he comes home from work, makes dinner, re-cleans the house, puts the kids (and me) to bed and studies and exercises. EVERY DAY! What a man!!! I love you Jas!
    

Happy Birthday Mom!

My mom's birthday was last week. Most of you know her and what an incredible person she is. I decided not to let this opportunity to brag about her slip by. I'd be dead without my mom. Seriously! She sewed my prom dress, my wedding dress, the girls' blessing dresses, and A LOT of other fancy and not so fancy things. It's a good thing she knows how to sew because I just can't do it. My kids will go naked after she's moved on...

My mom is the babysitter wonder. I know she gets tired of my kids sometimes but, she's always willing to watch them for me. I think about all those times when I was sick in bed and she came and picked them up and kept them for the day. (That was my favorite birthday present last year as well.) I'd be dead from a lack of sleep if not for her.

My mom can sing and play a myriad of instruments. I remember falling asleep to her playing the piano. It's one of the main reasons I stuck with my piano lessons. I wanted to do that for my family some day. I love when she sings around the house. She is currently in "the band". She plays the bass ukelelee (I have no idea at the moment how to spell that.) They sing old gospel songs and play on instruments like the gut bucket, etc. How cool is that? And I can get her autograph any time I want to.

Have you seen my mom's house and yard? Who has time for all that? She makes times. She's actually won awards for her garden. It's nice because we use her yard all summer to relax. And her house is decorated better than an interior designer's home. It's always beautiful and clean. (Except the time between when our kids get there and when we leave. Sorry Mom.) We always knew friends were welcome at our house.

I could go on and on...but I'm not gonna. I think she's pretty great and I wouldn't trade her for anyone. HONK IF YOU THINK MY MOM'S GREAT!!!

A "Little" Get Together...

Through the miracle of modern technology, I was able to contact and be contacted by certain friends from more than a decade ago (yep folks, I'm a gettin' old). These friends invited me and my family to "small" gathering. We attended with great anticipation. I was very pleased to see so many friends of old doing so well. Perhaps your reading comprehension skills lead to you wonder what possible foreshadowing the words in " " could mean. Well, wonder no longer. At last count I discovered that our gathering had also accumulated 28 children (give or take 5 or 6...) in one house. It appeared that the age range constituted ages 0 - 8 approximately. I didn't ask to find out how old the oldest child was, but man alive it was a CIRCUS! My kudos go to Jenny and her Husband (I'll remember his name probably 5 minutes after I'm done with the post) for their unwavering hospitality in hosting this monumental occasion.

As I am usually THE life of the party, it was I who requested a group photo of the adults (I guess I'm one of those now). And someday 30 years from now you'll all be thanking me for doing it. Please, please hold your accolades and offerings... I'm not asking for glory or recognition. But if anyone has 30 or 40 thousand dollars they want to give me to pay off student loans, I'll have NO SHAME in accepting it.

Anyway, back to business. Here are a few of the long-anticipated photos from the party. And thanks again to all of you for inviting me and making me and my family welcome. We are very grateful.